You've Got to be Tough

Throughout my life, my parents blessed me with many life lessons. They taught me the skills I would need to succeed and be a good person. The one that really stands out to be though is toughness. I have been, my whole life, the smallest in the class and the shortest among my peers.

From birth we knew I would not be the big guy in any group. So when I talk about "toughness" it wasn't of a physical kind. Being tough physically was never something I had. For most of my life I was dealing with illness in various degrees of severity, and being physically strong was never a priority, or even a possibility. Thanks to a life-saving transplant, it is now, but still, physical toughness will only get you so far in life. What separates those who succeed from the rest, is inner strength.

By no means do I hold myself up to be the perfect example of this trait. I'm a pretty tough guy in many ways, but I have many moments of weakness as well. I've learned too that it's often in those moments of weakness that I learn the most:) But I have been able to achieve some things that I credit mostly to an ability to block out pain and discomfort, and pursue the goal with single-minded determination. To me, that's what being tough is all about.

Here's a discouraging, but true fact, the world does not want you to succeed; at least not to your maximum potential. Was that too harsh? Sorry, but it's true. The world works on averages. It wants us all to fall into our allotted spot on the curve and be "normal". So if you decide that you want to be exceptional, you will most certainly meet with some resistance.

Now most of us don't recognize this resistance for what it is because it doesn't come in literal form most of the time. You probably won't have people literally tell you that you can't do something or that you have no business doing what you want to do, but that doesn't mean you won't receive those messages. Human beings have all kinds of ways of keeping each other down. It's our way of making ourselves feel more comfortable about what we have, or haven't achieved in our lives. Your job, is to be tougher than the resistance. If you want to become all that you were meant to be, you can't allow external forces, especially negative ones, shape your performance.

So how do you become tougher?
1. Articulate your personal truths and stick to them - Many people float through life without ever articulating what they believe, what they stand for, what matters most to them and what they want to achieve. When you do this you leave your destination entirely to chance. Know what you stand for and don't let anyone get in the way of that.

2. Make a Decision - I tell all the people I speak to who want to try a marathon the same thing; running a marathon is just putting one foot in front of the other until you get to the finish line. All you have to do is decide not to quit until you finish. Sound simple? It is. And it's a key to success. If you commit to yourself that you won't stop until you realize your goals, then you stand a MUCH higher chance of achieving them.

3. Find Your Why - Many people can't tell you why they do what they do. That's sad, and counterproductive. To succeed at the highest level you have to to have a "why". You need to know exactly why you do what you do. What is your motive? Is it a strong one? If you go to work just to make money and pay bills, you'll never be as successful and valuable as the employee who goes to work because they want to make a difference, because they genuinely care about their customer, or because they see it as they calling. Find your why, and suddenly being tough won't be so... well... tough:)