Limitations, or more accurately, perceived limitations, play a large role in our ability to realize our potential and achieve our goals. As a starting point to learn about how perceived limitations affect our lives, I'd ask you to consider this questions, "what would you do if you couldn't fail?" Seriously think about that for a minute...
Do you have a long list of things flooding your brain? Is there a litany of things that you haven't done that you'd like to do but haven't because you had some "good reason" why you couldn't? It is exactly in these things that you will find the sneaky power of limitations affecting you. Chances are good that whatever you have written off as "impractical", "impossible" or "unlikely" are only thus because you have decided they are. Today I want to encourage you to reconsider.
Now I don't want to be seen as getting carried away here. I will grant you that there are limitations. We all live in a physical world that physical world does have some limitations. And as physical beings we also have some physical limitations (not that most of us will come close to reaching them). The problem is not that some limitations exist, but rather that most of us never test them. Knowing we have limits, some of us make the choice to live lives steering far clear of those limits. We choose to use those limits as excuses not to push ourselves.
For example, what do you think you are worth? What salary are you making today? What is the maximum salary you can envision yourself making? Chances are good it's within 100% of what you make now. So if you make $40,000 you might be able to see yourself making $80,000-$100,000 one day, but you'd have a hard time imagining yourself making $300,000. Why is that a problem? Because you are placing artificial limits on yourself that need not hold you back.
The point isn't about money. You can be perfectly happy on $40,000, some are happy on much less and some are miserable with much more. I'm not meaning to imply that money is the key to happiness, but just that our mental perceptions have the power to hold us back from becoming all that we can be. Case in point, Ted Williams, the homeless man from Ohio who last week was living on the street, but since being 'discovered' for his great voice, has already recorded a commercial and appeared on the Today show (http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/7808698-homelessness-to-fame-for-ted-williams-nbc-2nd-chance-as-announcer-and-then-i-can-tell-you-what-the-kids-are-doing).
Granted most of us will not have such a dramatic transformation of our life circumstances, but the ARE possible, if you believe they are. Probably the most powerful example of expectations shaping reality for me comes from the world of running (no surprise for those who have been reading my blog and newsletters for a while).
You may be familiar with the story of Roger Banister. If you aren't, Roger Banister was the first man to run a mile in under 4minutes. Until he did it, hundreds had tried and failed. The record had stood for years and some scientists had even released research declaring it "physically impossible" for a human being to run a mile in under 4min. It just couldn't be done... until Roger Banister did it. What's more amazing than Banister's feat, which is an accomplishment in it's own right, is that AFTER Banister broke the 4min mile mark, more than 5 people went even faster in the next 10 years and MANY others also broke the 4min mark.
But that was impossible wasn't it? Of course not. It was perceived to be impossible. Like going to the moon, splitting the atom, and any other "impossible" thing that we as human beings have done, it was only impossible until we could make our mind see that it wasn't. Once the mind could get there, we weren't long behind.
So take a look this week at what is limiting you. Chances are good that it isn't really a limitation, just a perceived limitation. If you can get your mind around the idea that you can do it, than you can. Make 2011 the year you do something you used to think was impossible.
Showing posts with label setting goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label setting goals. Show all posts
Monday, January 10, 2011
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Will 2011 be Better than 2010?
As you read this there are less than 7 days remaining in the year 2010. As the year comes to an end, I wanted to ask you a few questions. If you can answer these questions honestly, you'll have have gotten off to a great start.
According to the Opinion Corporation of Princeton, NJ, 25% of people have NEVER realized a single New Year's Resolution and more than 90% have failed to achieve their resolutions at least once in their life. That might lead some to conclude that New Year's resolutions are a waste of time and doomed to failure. I don't think that's true.
If you read the data another way you see that 75% of people HAVE realized their resolutions at least once in their lives and 10% do it EVERY YEAR! If those resolutions are meaning life changes, then it is absolutely worth the effort. In fact another study sited in issue 4 (2002) of the Journal of Clinic Psychology states that people who set New Year's Resolutions are 10 TIMES more likely to attain their goals!
So clearly setting New Year's Resolutions can be a very worthwhile exercise. The question then becomes, what makes the difference between those who rarely achieve their resolutions and those special 8-10% who regularly employ New Year's resolutions to make positive changes in their lives? What can you do to ensure that you stand the best chance of success?
With some study and research, you discover three key actions that you can take to give yourself the best chance of succeeding at your New Year's Resolutions.
1. Consistent with your core values - You can not expect to realize a resolution that is inconsistent with who you are as a person. For example, someone who doesn't think money is important will have a hard time setting a New Year's resolution to gain wealth. Likewise, for someone for whom eating out a lot is important, losing 20lbs may not be a realistic resolution. So when setting resolutions ensure that the resolution matches your values. If they don't you have two choices: a) change your resolution b) change your values. Option A is certainly easier.
2. Be Exciting To You - Your resolutions have to resonate with you. They have to create feelings of excitement for you. If you aren't pumped to achieve your resolution, you have little chance of achieving them. Setting a resolution because you know it's good for you, is of little use. It's a nice idea, but that's all it will ever be. If you can't generate what Vince Pocente calls "emotional buzz" within yourself about your resolutions, they simply will not happen.
3. Create a Clear Vision of Your Future - Having a clear vision of what you want to achieve is critical for ensuring your success. You can not achieve anything if you won't now exactly what it is you're trying to do. A clear vision of what success looks like for you, is an essential part of the formula. So before you decide on what you want your resolutions to be, work on creating a clear vision of where you want your life to be in December of 2011. Then work backwards figuring out the actions you can take to get yourself from where you are to where you want to be in twelve months. Those actions should be the basis for your resolutions.
New Year's is an exciting time of year. Especially for people like me because it is the one time of the year when everyone is thinking about the things I think about all year. It is the one time of the year when most people are evaluating their lives and focusing on their future and what they want to achieve. I encourage you to use some of your time in this next week to do the same. Sit down and set some resolutions. Following the essential steps given above, you stand a great chance of succeeding.
Let me know how it goes...
- How has 2010 been for you? Where does it rate among the other years of your life? Best yet? Worst ever? Why?
- Will 2011 be better? How?
- What do I need to do to make 2011 my best year yet?
According to the Opinion Corporation of Princeton, NJ, 25% of people have NEVER realized a single New Year's Resolution and more than 90% have failed to achieve their resolutions at least once in their life. That might lead some to conclude that New Year's resolutions are a waste of time and doomed to failure. I don't think that's true.
If you read the data another way you see that 75% of people HAVE realized their resolutions at least once in their lives and 10% do it EVERY YEAR! If those resolutions are meaning life changes, then it is absolutely worth the effort. In fact another study sited in issue 4 (2002) of the Journal of Clinic Psychology states that people who set New Year's Resolutions are 10 TIMES more likely to attain their goals!
So clearly setting New Year's Resolutions can be a very worthwhile exercise. The question then becomes, what makes the difference between those who rarely achieve their resolutions and those special 8-10% who regularly employ New Year's resolutions to make positive changes in their lives? What can you do to ensure that you stand the best chance of success?
With some study and research, you discover three key actions that you can take to give yourself the best chance of succeeding at your New Year's Resolutions.
1. Consistent with your core values - You can not expect to realize a resolution that is inconsistent with who you are as a person. For example, someone who doesn't think money is important will have a hard time setting a New Year's resolution to gain wealth. Likewise, for someone for whom eating out a lot is important, losing 20lbs may not be a realistic resolution. So when setting resolutions ensure that the resolution matches your values. If they don't you have two choices: a) change your resolution b) change your values. Option A is certainly easier.
2. Be Exciting To You - Your resolutions have to resonate with you. They have to create feelings of excitement for you. If you aren't pumped to achieve your resolution, you have little chance of achieving them. Setting a resolution because you know it's good for you, is of little use. It's a nice idea, but that's all it will ever be. If you can't generate what Vince Pocente calls "emotional buzz" within yourself about your resolutions, they simply will not happen.
3. Create a Clear Vision of Your Future - Having a clear vision of what you want to achieve is critical for ensuring your success. You can not achieve anything if you won't now exactly what it is you're trying to do. A clear vision of what success looks like for you, is an essential part of the formula. So before you decide on what you want your resolutions to be, work on creating a clear vision of where you want your life to be in December of 2011. Then work backwards figuring out the actions you can take to get yourself from where you are to where you want to be in twelve months. Those actions should be the basis for your resolutions.
New Year's is an exciting time of year. Especially for people like me because it is the one time of the year when everyone is thinking about the things I think about all year. It is the one time of the year when most people are evaluating their lives and focusing on their future and what they want to achieve. I encourage you to use some of your time in this next week to do the same. Sit down and set some resolutions. Following the essential steps given above, you stand a great chance of succeeding.
Let me know how it goes...
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Why Should I Care?
Have you ever asked yourself this question when thinking about a particular situation? Have you ever heard about an event, read a news story, or been solicited by a charity and thought; "why should I care"? I have to admit that I used to have that reaction. I used to hear about wars in far off lands, natural disasters etc and think, "why does that matter to me"? But I don't anymore. I don't because somewhere along the path of my life I realized that we are all responsible for each other in this world. When something happens to one of us, it happens to all of us. When one of us succeeds, we all succeed and when one of us is hurting, we're all hurting. Of course I'm speaking figurative to a certain extent here, but our interconnectedness is very much a real thing.
On September 11th, 2001 many of us in North America began to think about things in a way we never had before. Even those of us miles away and in another country, felt, to some degree, the pain, fear and loss of our neighbours to the south. I'm sure none of us can fully grasp how New Yorkers felt that day, especially those who lost loved ones that day. And yet, we all feel someone connected to the victims of that horrible day.
What we can learn from that event, and any other incident where our fellow human beings are threatened, hurt and victimized, is that while there are many things we can't do anything about, there are far more that we CAN do something about. And in those cases, we should do whatever we can, whenever we can.
In the past few years I've had the chance to listen to many speakers at conferences around the country where I was also speaking. One of those who made the greatest impact on me, was Craig Kielburger. Craig started a charity called "Free the Children" when he was just 12 years old to help children around the world who were affected by, and often forced to fight in, wars around the world. Craig saw a problem and unlike many others, chose to do something about it. His charity has since built more than 500 hundred of schools around the world and positively impacted the lives of thousands of children. Why? Because Craig cared. He chose not to let his fellow human beings suffer when he could do something about it.
I had the chance to meet Craig after his presentation and after thanking him for his message, I had just one question for him, "how do you stop yourself from getting discouraged in the face of all of those whom you can't help?". After all, while his organization is doing so much great work, there are still so many whom he just doesn't have the time and resources to help. His answer was incredibly powerful to me. It provided the response to anyone who's excuse for not caring is that they can't make a difference because the problems are too big. When I asked Craig how he stopped himself from being discouraged by the sheer size of the problems facing the children of the third world, he used the words of Saint Theresa. He said, "Mark is once had the opportunity to meet Mother Theresa and when she was asked that question she said, 'God doesn't require that you succeed, he only requires that you try."
So why should you care? Because it is our duty as human beings. Because we are bound by our humanity to try. So go out there this week and care for someone else. In fact, care for everyone else. Be kind. Show compassion. Offer a smile. As Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world".
To support Craig Kielburger's organization Free the Children, CLICK HERE
On September 11th, 2001 many of us in North America began to think about things in a way we never had before. Even those of us miles away and in another country, felt, to some degree, the pain, fear and loss of our neighbours to the south. I'm sure none of us can fully grasp how New Yorkers felt that day, especially those who lost loved ones that day. And yet, we all feel someone connected to the victims of that horrible day.
What we can learn from that event, and any other incident where our fellow human beings are threatened, hurt and victimized, is that while there are many things we can't do anything about, there are far more that we CAN do something about. And in those cases, we should do whatever we can, whenever we can.
In the past few years I've had the chance to listen to many speakers at conferences around the country where I was also speaking. One of those who made the greatest impact on me, was Craig Kielburger. Craig started a charity called "Free the Children" when he was just 12 years old to help children around the world who were affected by, and often forced to fight in, wars around the world. Craig saw a problem and unlike many others, chose to do something about it. His charity has since built more than 500 hundred of schools around the world and positively impacted the lives of thousands of children. Why? Because Craig cared. He chose not to let his fellow human beings suffer when he could do something about it.
I had the chance to meet Craig after his presentation and after thanking him for his message, I had just one question for him, "how do you stop yourself from getting discouraged in the face of all of those whom you can't help?". After all, while his organization is doing so much great work, there are still so many whom he just doesn't have the time and resources to help. His answer was incredibly powerful to me. It provided the response to anyone who's excuse for not caring is that they can't make a difference because the problems are too big. When I asked Craig how he stopped himself from being discouraged by the sheer size of the problems facing the children of the third world, he used the words of Saint Theresa. He said, "Mark is once had the opportunity to meet Mother Theresa and when she was asked that question she said, 'God doesn't require that you succeed, he only requires that you try."
So why should you care? Because it is our duty as human beings. Because we are bound by our humanity to try. So go out there this week and care for someone else. In fact, care for everyone else. Be kind. Show compassion. Offer a smile. As Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world".
To support Craig Kielburger's organization Free the Children, CLICK HERE
Monday, May 10, 2010
Why Set Goals?
Yesterday I ran my fifth Half-Marathon. After sixteen weeks of training through the long, cold, winter, I ran the event two minutes shy of my goal time. But we had a blast, we finished it, and to me, that's a successful day.
There is more written about how to set and achieve goals than most of us would or could ever read. It's talked about in almost every self-help book I've ever read and is the focus of volumes in itself. What is talked about much less often, but I think equally important is not the HOW of setting and achieving goals, but the WHY.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, "Why should I bother setting a goal? What's the point?". I can say that, even as a motivational speaker who you might think takes goal setting as a given, I have spent a good deal of time thinking about the "why" of goal setting. After all, I think, if I'm going to suggest to people that this is something they should do, I ought to have a good reason. Here it is... it makes you happier. Goal setting makes your life better! And here's the best part, you don't necessarily need to achieve the goal in order to enjoy the happiness benefits that come with it!
Studies have shown that people are happy when they are pursuing a goal, but that once the goal is achieved, there is usually a sense of letdown. BEcause the happiness comes from the feelings one has while pursuing a goal, the realization of the goal is rarely as satisfying as anticipated, and once achieved is quickly incorporated into a persons understanding of reality and thus is less exciting. It is likely this same phenomenon responsible for the studies that show that lottery winners' levels of happiness return to base levels quite quickly. We all dream of the big lottery win, but once we get it, we realize that, hey, it's only money, it doesn't solve all of our problems, and we still have to deal with live like we did before.
So why set goals?
The biggest reason is that it improves our lives and the lives of others. Setting worth while goals makes you a better person, and depending on what they are, way also help many other people along the way as well. The entrepreneur who sets out to create a great company enriches the life of his family with this earnings, benefits his customers with his product or service, and helps all of his employees by providing gainful employment. Win, Win, Win.
The author who sets out to write the next great book benefits from the experience of writing and from the sales of his work. The readers who enjoy the work gain a nice experience of escape from the a novel or learning from a work of non-fiction. The people who work in the publishing house and the bookstores benefit from employment that comes from the selling of that book. Win, Win, Win.
These are all valid and worthwhile reasons to set goals, but the biggest of all is what pursuing a goal does for us internally. The sense of joy, usefulness and purpose that comes from having a goal to pursue are real and powerful. Having a goal gives a reason to get up in the morning. Having a goal gives our lives direction and purpose. Having a goal informs us about what matters and what doesn't and about how we should spend our time.
So go out there and set some goals. Try to achieve as many of them as you can. You probably won't achieve them all, but that's okay, in fact, it almost doesn't matter if you achieve them or not. After all it is the pursuit that makes you happy and improves your life. Achieving the goal is really just a bonus.
There is more written about how to set and achieve goals than most of us would or could ever read. It's talked about in almost every self-help book I've ever read and is the focus of volumes in itself. What is talked about much less often, but I think equally important is not the HOW of setting and achieving goals, but the WHY.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, "Why should I bother setting a goal? What's the point?". I can say that, even as a motivational speaker who you might think takes goal setting as a given, I have spent a good deal of time thinking about the "why" of goal setting. After all, I think, if I'm going to suggest to people that this is something they should do, I ought to have a good reason. Here it is... it makes you happier. Goal setting makes your life better! And here's the best part, you don't necessarily need to achieve the goal in order to enjoy the happiness benefits that come with it!
Studies have shown that people are happy when they are pursuing a goal, but that once the goal is achieved, there is usually a sense of letdown. BEcause the happiness comes from the feelings one has while pursuing a goal, the realization of the goal is rarely as satisfying as anticipated, and once achieved is quickly incorporated into a persons understanding of reality and thus is less exciting. It is likely this same phenomenon responsible for the studies that show that lottery winners' levels of happiness return to base levels quite quickly. We all dream of the big lottery win, but once we get it, we realize that, hey, it's only money, it doesn't solve all of our problems, and we still have to deal with live like we did before.
So why set goals?
The biggest reason is that it improves our lives and the lives of others. Setting worth while goals makes you a better person, and depending on what they are, way also help many other people along the way as well. The entrepreneur who sets out to create a great company enriches the life of his family with this earnings, benefits his customers with his product or service, and helps all of his employees by providing gainful employment. Win, Win, Win.
The author who sets out to write the next great book benefits from the experience of writing and from the sales of his work. The readers who enjoy the work gain a nice experience of escape from the a novel or learning from a work of non-fiction. The people who work in the publishing house and the bookstores benefit from employment that comes from the selling of that book. Win, Win, Win.
These are all valid and worthwhile reasons to set goals, but the biggest of all is what pursuing a goal does for us internally. The sense of joy, usefulness and purpose that comes from having a goal to pursue are real and powerful. Having a goal gives a reason to get up in the morning. Having a goal gives our lives direction and purpose. Having a goal informs us about what matters and what doesn't and about how we should spend our time.
So go out there and set some goals. Try to achieve as many of them as you can. You probably won't achieve them all, but that's okay, in fact, it almost doesn't matter if you achieve them or not. After all it is the pursuit that makes you happy and improves your life. Achieving the goal is really just a bonus.
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