Life. What is it? Many people have defined it, many have tried to explain it and many have expressed their feelings about it but no one I've read or heard yet has been able to explain, express or define it's beauty. I won't be able to either, but today I want to remind you of the beauty, the wonder and the gift that is life. To do that, I want to share with you a perspective we can all appreciate, that of my two year old daughter, Emma.
Emma is a constant reminder to me that life is an awesome, beautiful and amazing thing. Because of her youth, she is amazed by nearly everything. We go for a walk and she sees an ant crawling on the ground, she stops, she examines it, she watched it walk along the pavement and she takes it all in. She is awestruck by this ant. To her, it is an amazing thing.
Later on our walk she will notice the sewer drain in the side of the road. She hears the sound of rushing water and she stops to listen and watch, to see what can be discovered from this interesting discovery.
A while later she'll ask to push her stroller with her baby doll in it. She'll walk along proudly pushing her baby and talking to her the whole length of the walk, describing what's happening, pointing things out to her (or at least that's what I assume she's doing since I can rarely make out more than a few words she says to her baby). Finally we come back to our driveway and Emma fights not to go inside. She loves to walk, to discover, to play and she doesn't want it to end. I bring her inside as she cries I try to re-assure her that we will go on other walks. There will be more discovering another day.
What Emma has taught me, and continues to teach me, is that life is amazing. There is so much to be discovered, appreciated and enjoyed. She doesn't need a good reason to laugh, she just does it. She doesn't need anything truly extraordinary (at least by adult standards) to be awestruck and amazed, she takes everything in with a true appreciation and amazement for the wonder that is life. And it's inspiring to watch.
Emma reminds me, and should remind us all, that life is a beautiful and amazing and it should be a valuable gift that we treasure and use to the best of our abilities. As adults it can be easy to forget this amongst the bills, work, responsibilities, stress, but we need to. We need to remember that life is short, and we shouldn't waste a minute of it complaining, worrying or doing anything but appreciating and using it.
Today may you be more open the wonder and beauty that is your life. Take a moment to breathe in the fresh morning air. Take a second to really SEE. Take in the blue sky, the sun and the rainbows. It's an amazing, beautiful and awe-inspiring world out there. Enjoy it!
Monday, May 31, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Why Should I Care?
Have you ever asked yourself this question when thinking about a particular situation? Have you ever heard about an event, read a news story, or been solicited by a charity and thought; "why should I care"? I have to admit that I used to have that reaction. I used to hear about wars in far off lands, natural disasters etc and think, "why does that matter to me"? But I don't anymore. I don't because somewhere along the path of my life I realized that we are all responsible for each other in this world. When something happens to one of us, it happens to all of us. When one of us succeeds, we all succeed and when one of us is hurting, we're all hurting. Of course I'm speaking figurative to a certain extent here, but our interconnectedness is very much a real thing.
On September 11th, 2001 many of us in North America began to think about things in a way we never had before. Even those of us miles away and in another country, felt, to some degree, the pain, fear and loss of our neighbours to the south. I'm sure none of us can fully grasp how New Yorkers felt that day, especially those who lost loved ones that day. And yet, we all feel someone connected to the victims of that horrible day.
What we can learn from that event, and any other incident where our fellow human beings are threatened, hurt and victimized, is that while there are many things we can't do anything about, there are far more that we CAN do something about. And in those cases, we should do whatever we can, whenever we can.
In the past few years I've had the chance to listen to many speakers at conferences around the country where I was also speaking. One of those who made the greatest impact on me, was Craig Kielburger. Craig started a charity called "Free the Children" when he was just 12 years old to help children around the world who were affected by, and often forced to fight in, wars around the world. Craig saw a problem and unlike many others, chose to do something about it. His charity has since built more than 500 hundred of schools around the world and positively impacted the lives of thousands of children. Why? Because Craig cared. He chose not to let his fellow human beings suffer when he could do something about it.
I had the chance to meet Craig after his presentation and after thanking him for his message, I had just one question for him, "how do you stop yourself from getting discouraged in the face of all of those whom you can't help?". After all, while his organization is doing so much great work, there are still so many whom he just doesn't have the time and resources to help. His answer was incredibly powerful to me. It provided the response to anyone who's excuse for not caring is that they can't make a difference because the problems are too big. When I asked Craig how he stopped himself from being discouraged by the sheer size of the problems facing the children of the third world, he used the words of Saint Theresa. He said, "Mark is once had the opportunity to meet Mother Theresa and when she was asked that question she said, 'God doesn't require that you succeed, he only requires that you try."
So why should you care? Because it is our duty as human beings. Because we are bound by our humanity to try. So go out there this week and care for someone else. In fact, care for everyone else. Be kind. Show compassion. Offer a smile. As Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world".
To support Craig Kielburger's organization Free the Children, CLICK HERE
On September 11th, 2001 many of us in North America began to think about things in a way we never had before. Even those of us miles away and in another country, felt, to some degree, the pain, fear and loss of our neighbours to the south. I'm sure none of us can fully grasp how New Yorkers felt that day, especially those who lost loved ones that day. And yet, we all feel someone connected to the victims of that horrible day.
What we can learn from that event, and any other incident where our fellow human beings are threatened, hurt and victimized, is that while there are many things we can't do anything about, there are far more that we CAN do something about. And in those cases, we should do whatever we can, whenever we can.
In the past few years I've had the chance to listen to many speakers at conferences around the country where I was also speaking. One of those who made the greatest impact on me, was Craig Kielburger. Craig started a charity called "Free the Children" when he was just 12 years old to help children around the world who were affected by, and often forced to fight in, wars around the world. Craig saw a problem and unlike many others, chose to do something about it. His charity has since built more than 500 hundred of schools around the world and positively impacted the lives of thousands of children. Why? Because Craig cared. He chose not to let his fellow human beings suffer when he could do something about it.
I had the chance to meet Craig after his presentation and after thanking him for his message, I had just one question for him, "how do you stop yourself from getting discouraged in the face of all of those whom you can't help?". After all, while his organization is doing so much great work, there are still so many whom he just doesn't have the time and resources to help. His answer was incredibly powerful to me. It provided the response to anyone who's excuse for not caring is that they can't make a difference because the problems are too big. When I asked Craig how he stopped himself from being discouraged by the sheer size of the problems facing the children of the third world, he used the words of Saint Theresa. He said, "Mark is once had the opportunity to meet Mother Theresa and when she was asked that question she said, 'God doesn't require that you succeed, he only requires that you try."
So why should you care? Because it is our duty as human beings. Because we are bound by our humanity to try. So go out there this week and care for someone else. In fact, care for everyone else. Be kind. Show compassion. Offer a smile. As Ghandi said "Be the change you want to see in the world".
To support Craig Kielburger's organization Free the Children, CLICK HERE
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Simple Pleasures, Beautiful Moments
With each passing year, I come more and more to realize that the greatest joys in life come from simple pleasures and beautiful moments. It truly is "not the years in our life but the life in our years" that matters.
Last night I enjoyed one of those beautiful moments that makes you grateful to be alive. Unlike most nights when I allow my wife to do the work of putting our two year old daughter Emma, to bed, last night I took over the job. I wasn't particularly excited to do it since yesterday was a tough day for Emma. She's fighting a cold, cutting her molars and in general just not in a good mood. She'd been whiny all night and I didn't exactly relish the thought of putting her to bed. But I'm certainly glad now that I did.
After brushing our teeth (yes I have to brush mine too so that she'll brush hers) we went to pick out a story. Emma picked the Sears catalogue to read (one of her favourites... I know it doesn't make any sense, but it's what she likes). After flipping through the pages for a while and finding the dolls and the toys, we closed it and I was ready to put her in her crib, but instead of doing that, I decided to just hold her in my arms and rock her a bit.
Normally, Emma is very squirmy, even at bed time, and doesn't let you hold her for too long. But last night she allowed her father the chance to hold her in his arms and just rock with her and then I started to sing. Nothing in particular, bits and pieces of different songs as lyrics came into my head. It didn't matter what I sang I knew. She just laid her little head on my shoulder and allowed me that simple, beautiful, moment. And it did take my breath away.
So often we get caught up in the constant struggle to create great moments in our lives. We spend months planning elaborate trips and parties, we schedule every minute of our vacations, and we try to pack in as much as we can. We work hard at our fun sometimes. But often, the greatest joys in life, the moments that take our breath away, are the simplest, and the cheapest. They're the moments that sneak up on us. All we have to do is sit back, let them happen and take them in.
Today I wish you many, many beautiful moments. I encourage you to be open to them and when they happen, to recognize and appreciate them. For they are the true treasures of life.
Last night I enjoyed one of those beautiful moments that makes you grateful to be alive. Unlike most nights when I allow my wife to do the work of putting our two year old daughter Emma, to bed, last night I took over the job. I wasn't particularly excited to do it since yesterday was a tough day for Emma. She's fighting a cold, cutting her molars and in general just not in a good mood. She'd been whiny all night and I didn't exactly relish the thought of putting her to bed. But I'm certainly glad now that I did.
After brushing our teeth (yes I have to brush mine too so that she'll brush hers) we went to pick out a story. Emma picked the Sears catalogue to read (one of her favourites... I know it doesn't make any sense, but it's what she likes). After flipping through the pages for a while and finding the dolls and the toys, we closed it and I was ready to put her in her crib, but instead of doing that, I decided to just hold her in my arms and rock her a bit.
Normally, Emma is very squirmy, even at bed time, and doesn't let you hold her for too long. But last night she allowed her father the chance to hold her in his arms and just rock with her and then I started to sing. Nothing in particular, bits and pieces of different songs as lyrics came into my head. It didn't matter what I sang I knew. She just laid her little head on my shoulder and allowed me that simple, beautiful, moment. And it did take my breath away.
So often we get caught up in the constant struggle to create great moments in our lives. We spend months planning elaborate trips and parties, we schedule every minute of our vacations, and we try to pack in as much as we can. We work hard at our fun sometimes. But often, the greatest joys in life, the moments that take our breath away, are the simplest, and the cheapest. They're the moments that sneak up on us. All we have to do is sit back, let them happen and take them in.
Today I wish you many, many beautiful moments. I encourage you to be open to them and when they happen, to recognize and appreciate them. For they are the true treasures of life.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Setting UNrealistic and UNachievable Goals
Conventional goal-setting wisdom advises, among other things, that you make your goals: achievable and realistic. I think that's crap. If goals were meant to be achievable and realistic most of the world's greatest achievements and inventions would never have happened. Effective goals should be UN-realistic and NOT QUITE Achievable. Why?
1. Because if you want to be motivated to achieve something, you need to be excited about it, and it's hard to get excited about something you know you can do in your sleep.
2. Goals are meant to help you realize your potential. If a goal isn't pushing you beyond your comfort zone, it's not doing it's job!
Am I suggesting that your goals should be completely impossible? No, there's not much point in that. For example, the goal to become the world's fastest marathoner is not mine - at 4'11" with a new heart and lungs it just plain ain't ever gonna happen. I'll also never be the biggest, fastest or strongest at anything. And that's ok with me.
As a motivational speaker, you might expect me to say that anyone can do anything, but I won't say that because truth be told, that just isn't true, and we all know it. But what is also true, is that a whole lot more is possible than most people think, and you will never achieve more than you think is possible. You just gotta' believe.
This week I challenge you to challenge yourself. When was the last time you really pushed yourself? When was the last time you explored your limits and tried to go beyond them? When was the last time you re-examined what you consider "impossible" and then proved yourself wrong? Part of living fully is daring to fail enough to find out what you're really capable of doing. So go out there this week and fail. Set some UN-realistic and UN-achievable goals. You might just do something incredible!
____________________________________________________________________________________
Learn more about Mark's inspirational programs and his best-selling book "Live Life from the Heart: 52 Weeks to a Life of Passion and Purpose" go to: www.MarkBlackSpeaks.com
1. Because if you want to be motivated to achieve something, you need to be excited about it, and it's hard to get excited about something you know you can do in your sleep.
2. Goals are meant to help you realize your potential. If a goal isn't pushing you beyond your comfort zone, it's not doing it's job!
Am I suggesting that your goals should be completely impossible? No, there's not much point in that. For example, the goal to become the world's fastest marathoner is not mine - at 4'11" with a new heart and lungs it just plain ain't ever gonna happen. I'll also never be the biggest, fastest or strongest at anything. And that's ok with me.
As a motivational speaker, you might expect me to say that anyone can do anything, but I won't say that because truth be told, that just isn't true, and we all know it. But what is also true, is that a whole lot more is possible than most people think, and you will never achieve more than you think is possible. You just gotta' believe.
This week I challenge you to challenge yourself. When was the last time you really pushed yourself? When was the last time you explored your limits and tried to go beyond them? When was the last time you re-examined what you consider "impossible" and then proved yourself wrong? Part of living fully is daring to fail enough to find out what you're really capable of doing. So go out there this week and fail. Set some UN-realistic and UN-achievable goals. You might just do something incredible!
____________________________________________________________________________________
Learn more about Mark's inspirational programs and his best-selling book "Live Life from the Heart: 52 Weeks to a Life of Passion and Purpose" go to: www.MarkBlackSpeaks.com
Monday, May 10, 2010
Why Set Goals?
Yesterday I ran my fifth Half-Marathon. After sixteen weeks of training through the long, cold, winter, I ran the event two minutes shy of my goal time. But we had a blast, we finished it, and to me, that's a successful day.
There is more written about how to set and achieve goals than most of us would or could ever read. It's talked about in almost every self-help book I've ever read and is the focus of volumes in itself. What is talked about much less often, but I think equally important is not the HOW of setting and achieving goals, but the WHY.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, "Why should I bother setting a goal? What's the point?". I can say that, even as a motivational speaker who you might think takes goal setting as a given, I have spent a good deal of time thinking about the "why" of goal setting. After all, I think, if I'm going to suggest to people that this is something they should do, I ought to have a good reason. Here it is... it makes you happier. Goal setting makes your life better! And here's the best part, you don't necessarily need to achieve the goal in order to enjoy the happiness benefits that come with it!
Studies have shown that people are happy when they are pursuing a goal, but that once the goal is achieved, there is usually a sense of letdown. BEcause the happiness comes from the feelings one has while pursuing a goal, the realization of the goal is rarely as satisfying as anticipated, and once achieved is quickly incorporated into a persons understanding of reality and thus is less exciting. It is likely this same phenomenon responsible for the studies that show that lottery winners' levels of happiness return to base levels quite quickly. We all dream of the big lottery win, but once we get it, we realize that, hey, it's only money, it doesn't solve all of our problems, and we still have to deal with live like we did before.
So why set goals?
The biggest reason is that it improves our lives and the lives of others. Setting worth while goals makes you a better person, and depending on what they are, way also help many other people along the way as well. The entrepreneur who sets out to create a great company enriches the life of his family with this earnings, benefits his customers with his product or service, and helps all of his employees by providing gainful employment. Win, Win, Win.
The author who sets out to write the next great book benefits from the experience of writing and from the sales of his work. The readers who enjoy the work gain a nice experience of escape from the a novel or learning from a work of non-fiction. The people who work in the publishing house and the bookstores benefit from employment that comes from the selling of that book. Win, Win, Win.
These are all valid and worthwhile reasons to set goals, but the biggest of all is what pursuing a goal does for us internally. The sense of joy, usefulness and purpose that comes from having a goal to pursue are real and powerful. Having a goal gives a reason to get up in the morning. Having a goal gives our lives direction and purpose. Having a goal informs us about what matters and what doesn't and about how we should spend our time.
So go out there and set some goals. Try to achieve as many of them as you can. You probably won't achieve them all, but that's okay, in fact, it almost doesn't matter if you achieve them or not. After all it is the pursuit that makes you happy and improves your life. Achieving the goal is really just a bonus.
There is more written about how to set and achieve goals than most of us would or could ever read. It's talked about in almost every self-help book I've ever read and is the focus of volumes in itself. What is talked about much less often, but I think equally important is not the HOW of setting and achieving goals, but the WHY.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, "Why should I bother setting a goal? What's the point?". I can say that, even as a motivational speaker who you might think takes goal setting as a given, I have spent a good deal of time thinking about the "why" of goal setting. After all, I think, if I'm going to suggest to people that this is something they should do, I ought to have a good reason. Here it is... it makes you happier. Goal setting makes your life better! And here's the best part, you don't necessarily need to achieve the goal in order to enjoy the happiness benefits that come with it!
Studies have shown that people are happy when they are pursuing a goal, but that once the goal is achieved, there is usually a sense of letdown. BEcause the happiness comes from the feelings one has while pursuing a goal, the realization of the goal is rarely as satisfying as anticipated, and once achieved is quickly incorporated into a persons understanding of reality and thus is less exciting. It is likely this same phenomenon responsible for the studies that show that lottery winners' levels of happiness return to base levels quite quickly. We all dream of the big lottery win, but once we get it, we realize that, hey, it's only money, it doesn't solve all of our problems, and we still have to deal with live like we did before.
So why set goals?
The biggest reason is that it improves our lives and the lives of others. Setting worth while goals makes you a better person, and depending on what they are, way also help many other people along the way as well. The entrepreneur who sets out to create a great company enriches the life of his family with this earnings, benefits his customers with his product or service, and helps all of his employees by providing gainful employment. Win, Win, Win.
The author who sets out to write the next great book benefits from the experience of writing and from the sales of his work. The readers who enjoy the work gain a nice experience of escape from the a novel or learning from a work of non-fiction. The people who work in the publishing house and the bookstores benefit from employment that comes from the selling of that book. Win, Win, Win.
These are all valid and worthwhile reasons to set goals, but the biggest of all is what pursuing a goal does for us internally. The sense of joy, usefulness and purpose that comes from having a goal to pursue are real and powerful. Having a goal gives a reason to get up in the morning. Having a goal gives our lives direction and purpose. Having a goal informs us about what matters and what doesn't and about how we should spend our time.
So go out there and set some goals. Try to achieve as many of them as you can. You probably won't achieve them all, but that's okay, in fact, it almost doesn't matter if you achieve them or not. After all it is the pursuit that makes you happy and improves your life. Achieving the goal is really just a bonus.
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